How to become a Hackerman

How does one become hacker? Use a hacker editor. Vim is the text editor used by all the most elite hackers on this globe. If you want to be a cool hacker lady or hacker boy, there’s only one way to do it: vim.

Why vim? Well, here’s why: we have: in vim:

• Insert mode
• Move fast
• Press keys
• Can’t quit

If you use vim, you are cool. If you use notepad, you are stupid. If you use IDE, you are baby. If you use emacs, you are just dumb. There’s only one editor for me, and that’s the one that starts with ‘V’, and ends with ’m’, and has an ‘i’.

I have a tattoo of hjkl on my ass. If you took the first letter of each sentence in this paragraph, it would spell ‘IIT’. Thanks to vim I figured that out in 2 minutes.

I have two great shortcuts in my .vimrc (vim really cool) for coding with more power. When I finish a sentence, vim automatically commits the file with the message “Hacking”. When I press an arrow key my computer restarts, and even better, shoots me.

I’ve been using vim since before it was invented, so if you think you know more about it than me you can just shut your dang mouth.:w

I will never use anything else. You can’t make me.